Game of Thrones: Spoil(ers) of War

WARNING: Contains spoilers for Game of Thrones Season 7 Episode 4.

Recovered from last night’s Game of Thrones episode Spoils of War yet? No? Good, us neither. Glad to know I wasn’t the only one making velociraptor noises at the T.V., making manic hand motions like a deranged traffic conductor, and spilling my tea everywhere. If I’ve learned anything it’s to never watch this show with a steaming hot beverage in the vicinity. Oh and that ONLY. A. FOOL. WOULD. MEET. THE. DOTHRAKI. IN. AN. OPEN. FIELD. Robert Baratheon obviously knew what the craic was.

Before getting carried away here let’s take a minute to appreciate a few of the moments of goodness that the Lord of the Seven, or showrunners Benioff and Weiss, gracefully bestowed upon us last night.

There’s a Stark difference between these two…

It’s been almost five whole seasons, Winter is Here after all, and Sansa and Arya Stark have finally reunited. Unlike Jon and Rickon (still not over that btw) they actually had the beautiful moment we’ve all been waiting for. Hugging in a cellar under a poorly carved statue of their brutally slaughtered father. They certainly know how to pull on our heart strings.
The undeniable truth was that these sisters have seen and experienced a heck of a lot in their time apart. Sansa may be Lady Stark now but she is worlds away from the wide eyed girl who was only interested in fairy tale weddings and flowing dresses. Last week we saw her thrive as she gave orders about grain reserves and leather coated breastplates – she proved she can keep a courtyard in line. Plus she gets bonus points for letting Ramsay Bolton be ravaged by his own dogs. Ah sweet revenge.
It’s little Arya, however, who is almost unrecognisable to her sister. From young tom boy to fully fledged assassin, the youngest Stark girl has been changed irrevocably by her journey. I swear I thought Brienne was going to shed a single tear of pride when she realised what a badass, sword weilding machine Arya has become. When she asked who taught her and Arya responded with “no one” I think I heard the whole of the GOT fandom erupt into choruses of yassss.

Arya and Sansa Reunite
Arya and Sansa Reunite / HBO

Bend that Knee Jon Snow

Back over at Dragonstone our lovable, yet painfully brooding, Jon Snow finally found a way to prove that the Night King is as real Drogon himself. And how did he do that? Well with the chalk doodles ancient hieroglyphics conveniently located in a cave right under Dragonstone castle. By proving that both the First Men and the Children of the Forest worked together despite their differences, he encourages Dany to do the same “Because the enemy is real, it’s always been real.” This is enough for her to offer her support, abandon the war and head off to fight the real bad guys. Just kidding, she’ll only help if he bends the knee.

Hereeee’s Drogon!

Despite all of this the last 13 minutes of this episode stole the show. Drogon and Dany vs. Jaime and Bronn. They really turned the tables here as we’ve never before felt so utterly conflicted about a battle. As I winced and feared for Bronn’s life as a freaking dragon flew straight at him, I screamed as Qyburn’s arrow lodged into Drogon scales. Talk about not being able to make your mind up. Can’t we all just take a minute, relax, and solve this madness without slaughtering everyone we hold dear? I know. It’s never going to happen but I can dream.
Dany’s army didn’t stop with a mere dragon though, as she brought the Dothraki horde in full force who made the mighty Lannister soldiers look like little boys playing dress up. Shooting arrows whilst standing on a horse that’s galloping into battle? Khal Drogo would certainly be proud.

Drogon
Drogon Demolishing The Loot Train / HBO

This brings us to Tyrion – who uttered a few words that have been ringing in my head since, (props to Peter Dinklage for that delivery), “Flee, you idiot” as he watched Jaime make a mad dash at Daenerys. Did he just realise that his brother might be toast and that perhaps an alliance with the Mad King’s daughter wasn’t a great idea after all? Who knows – but thank the Lord of Light that Bronn, (the real MVP here), pushed Jaime out of the path of the flames and into safety. No wait, into a river where he was literally weighed down by his Lannister gold armor. His poor pallid face will no doubt haunt us for the next week as we wait for the next installment of season 7.

So what now? Besides scrolling through every list of the best memes on the internet (thanks Buzzfeed).

Why not check out the very spot where the exterior shots of Dragonstone (the episode and location) was filmed? Head to Downhill Strand in County Derry/Londonderry to walk in the (sandy) footsteps of Dany, Jon and their respective crews. Or if that doesn’t satisfy you, you can always explore the rest of Westeros and save 11% with our Game of Thrones Tours.

Downhill Strand / Tourism Northern Ireland

 

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